Defender of the Basic | Hardly Working

November 4, 2019 posted by

(Upbeat music) – Now, see, Beethoven actually refers to the Charles Grodin character. The dog is Beethoven’s monster. – Oh fuck, now I have to
rewrite this entire think piece. – Sorry. – Screw it. Hey Jess! What’re you up to? – Scented candles! I’m decorating my room this weekend. – Cool, you gonna hang up
some little fairy lights too? – Do you have gauzy curtains and a sign that says “dream”? – Yeah, how did you guys know that? – I’m sorry Jess, it’s just sometimes you
can be a little basic. It’s whatever. – I’m sorry. – Oh! – What oh you know-it-alls and killjoys? Your days of terror are at an end! – Who are you? – It is I, Sir John Doe! The normal knight, defender of the basic and champion of the plain! My lady, these brigins
have not sorcered you with their preteniory, or made fun of you for caring too much about
your own birthday, have they? – No. – Very well. Serpents of the ivory tower- – Is there not security? – Why have you cheeped and tittered at this fair maiden’s scented candles? – It’s just- – She’s- – She just has tastes that are basic. – Basic? – Yeah. – Haha, I laugh. Would you object to the sweet
smell of vanilla and bean, for the sake of its commonness alone? – No. – Yes. – Well, yes, but, I don’t know, okay. It’s the pumpkin spice
latte of home decoration. – The most noble symbol of my house. Drink. – I’m cool. – Drink or perish, coward. – Okay. Man, that’s good. – Course it’s good, it’s a
hot pumpkin flavored milkshake you can drink in the middle
of the day. It’s incredible. – My red eye! – Hipster swill. – A frappuccino, really? Fuck, that’s good. It’s really good. – It’s good. – It’s really good. – Basic things always are. – That’s not true, what
about being a sexy cat every year for Halloween? – A cheap, easy costume that honors the spirit of the holidays and let’s you flirt with cute boys. – But, she’s always telling stories about her semester abroad. – A college story and a travel
story for the price of one, count me in! – Her favorite artist is Taylor Swift. – Red bangs from beginning to end and only a fool would claim otherwise. – She said that she’d rather
own every Marvel movie than the Criterion collection. – 18 beautiful movies,
interconnected into a single tapestry a surging saga exploring
the nature of power and responsibility. – They’re all the same though. – As are sunsets and rainbows, you viper! So what if this young woman
has a poster of Audrey Hepburn across from a poster of the Eiffel Tower caddycorner to a mural that
says “live, laugh, love” framed in Christmas lights? – What? How did you know that? – Cause of course you do. Because those things are wonderful. Audrey Hepburn is an
icon, Paris is romantic. Christmas lights make small,
depressing rooms feel warm and welcoming, and live,
laugh, love is great advice for anybody! – But we don’t hate basic people, it’s just that their taste is defined by what everyone else is in to. – So, you would never do
what a basic person does? – No! – So you’re taste is also defined by what everybody else does? – We’re frauds. – Pizza is my favorite food. – Yes, and? – I prefer milk chocolate
to dark chocolate. – Of course you do, it
has more sugar in it. – I fantasize about singing
Disney songs at karaoke. – That would be fun, everyone
would know all the words and sing along! – My favorite position is missionary. – Mine’s cowgirl! – Of course they are, who’s trying to do a bunch
of work in the bedroom? Not me! – Not me! – No! – Oh, wow! – Live your lives, scoop your bagels, find your favorite quote in
the loopiest font you can and make that your cover photo. Should you ever need me,
you need but message me, at my dog’s Instagram account. – That is fun! – That is fun!
– What is it, I’ll follow it. – At Sirbarksalot.
– Oh my God is that his name? – Well, we call him
Barksy around the house. – He’s verified! – I love that! – That’s crazy, Katie’s not even verified. – Hey guys, it’s Brennan
from College Humor. Click here to subscribe. Click here for more fun stuff. Please keep watching because if you stop
watching I start to vanish. You get it, I’m not really real. I’m just a thing on your screen. Don’t forget me!


100 Replies to “Defender of the Basic | Hardly Working”

  1. David Peacock says:

    a CH classic

  2. Xander Michels says:

    anyone know what the criterion collection actually is?

  3. Water says:


  4. Phi Dương says:

    14 years old girls love him

  5. Laura East says:

    I know it makes me basic but I need the logo on his tabard as merch. C'mon CollegeHumor, shut up and take my money.

  6. supersmex says:

    Pumpkin spice all the things.

  7. Kayle Watson says:

    Anyone else here after watching the Basic Bitch and Basic Bro videos? No…Just me?

  8. purplecatlover1825 randompizza says:

    I'm a mixture between

    And nerd of various things

  9. A says:

    that smol 1 second dig at katie in the end

  10. shadowgirl765 says:

    Everything was good. Except the part about every Marvel movie being the same. That part was wrong.

  11. James Holbrook says:

    I mean would you prefer to be acidic

  12. Sweetroll Bandit says:

    My Hero! Sir Defender of the Basic!

  13. Brenna says:

    I hope Brennan writes his own movie.

  14. bluebanana says:

    Ewww who likes milk chocolate over dark chocolate?

  15. Grubsirrah Simon says:

    Katy is Not Verified 😂😂

  16. Huff -an- Puff says:

    Love how one of the most basic things in the video is Mike’s clothes

  17. XxSWAGGERxX says:

    When did liking pizza become basic?

  18. 8 eyed guy says:


  19. Max Timmermans says:

    Brennen best writer

  20. pajamasandmore says:

    Fantastic. I love this.

  21. wildreams says:

    Because of course you do! Because those things are wonderful. Nice emotional roller-coaster there.

  22. MrKazington says:

    hahahahaha <3

  23. S. Fray says:

    Does anyone else get the feeling that everyone at C.H. is a huuugggeeeee liberal.

  24. Surya Mohan says:

    I like dark chocolate tho but ya point taken

  25. Acacia Camael says:

    He's wrong…..pumpkin spice lattes are gross but travel stories sound fun

  26. Sean McDonald says:

    Well, actually, ALL sunsets and sunrises arent the same because the planet spins and this affects the weather which in turn influences how a sunset appears but i get the basic premise but Pumpkin spiced lattes are for pretentious hipsters.

  27. Australian Bleach says:

    Anyone know what the song around the end is called?

  28. Ethan Ramirez says:

    Illuminati candles aren't basic.

  29. Dirk Farm says:

    This episode was basically excellent. And needless to say Brennen is an outstanding actor

  30. Coolio ajp says:

    More skits like this please

  31. M L says:

    god you don't know how many times i've sent this to people in a not so subtle way of telling them to f off with that edgelord hipster shit and just let people enjoy things

  32. alifia ! says:


  33. Daniel Smith says:

    This like to dislike ratio is basic asf

  34. TheTheatreQueen says:

    “Scoop your bagels” in my family, scooping your bagels is like the 8th sin

  35. Shuu秀修 says:

    Oh. I guess I'm a normie.

  36. Jack Worrell says:

    To be fair Red does bang from start to finish.

  37. WierdHairGrows says:

    Who tf doesn’t like Frappuccino’s

  38. Umair Usman says:

    This is so upliftin

  39. Okeirany says:

    They're saying all their positions and I'm just over here like… speed bump?

  40. Blake Feary says:

    Beethoven's monster is one of the funniest things I've ever heard

  41. Kuziva Stephanie Kainga says:

    Taylor Swift’s Red does bang from beginning to end 🥰

  42. BigRedBeard says:

    Sometimes it's okay to escape into things that are simple or nostalgic. We all need a chance to relax with our favorite guilty pleasures every once and a while. I love the message in this video. It almost brings a small sappy tear to my eye.

  43. Midnight Marauder says:

    Ha ha I laugh! 😁

  44. Callum Boyagoda says:

    So, how about that illuminati sign @ 0:17 on the candle…

    Is this just a no-go with the comments or…

  45. Narly_Blue says:

    "He's verified! Katie's not even verified.."
    Damn 😂

  46. Leonardo Gómez says:

    Top 10 beta trilogys of the cinematic history

  47. Suyash J says:

    Brennan is a writing / acting genius. He will be in a Hollywood movie some day.

  48. VultureClone says:

    The fact that we're all watching a College Humor video makes us all at least a little basic.

  49. Pls nerf low-rez says:

    Jess is so sweet in this

  50. Aka that asian kid单哲韵 says:

    I like vanilla……..

  51. Jo Robins says:

    Watching this today as I build up the courage to go order a Pumpkin Spice Latte.

  52. Rishiraj Kamdar says:

    Who wrote this…'s awesome

  53. David Rich says:

    Can’t believe he didn’t refer to himself as a dog-dad.

  54. Rainbow Arts says:

    ‘The DOG is Beethoven’s monster.’ Lol

  55. ZENTORU. IIV says:

    Comes straight from the pawns of the chess board

  56. CiCiDiaries says:

    I feel like nowadays this can be applied to vsco girls

  57. Nicholas Hogan says:


  58. necro nerd says:

    The marvel movie thing is so true tho
    Just cause they are similar doesn’t mean they aren’t fun to watch

  59. RenegadeRetard says:

    Thanks for naming Brennan John Doe I love roblox lol

  60. says:

    I think the main reason this"anti-mainstream" movement exists is because we all strive to be different than others. Our culture makes us scared of being common/average which equates to being boring for many…That's how we get people who feel superior because they don't follow trends. 

    And if someone lacks self-confidence and gets called a "sheep" for following these trends, it's easy to join the other side without realizing you're also becoming a sheep by doing that.

    The key is to realize that liking things that are liked by other people doesn't strip away our individuality/uniqueness, and that these things are also popular for a reason, which this skit brilliantly outlines.

    How NOT to be basic : be yourself, without shame.

  61. dual8288 says:

    i mean he's right but also i will lose my shit if i ever hear anyone talk about the marvel movies ever again for any reason

  62. meex me says:

    Dark chocolate is amazing.
    Pizza is waaaayyyy too salty and is never above just okay.
    And I was walked into a home store and all their candles were pumpkin spice. And i almost puked. But frapuccinos are amazing. And fairy lights are cute.

  63. meex me says:

    Why do people like bagels? Think about it. It just tastes like stale bread

  64. killerskyhawk None says:


  65. Johnathon Fake Name says:

    "as are sunsets and rainbows, you viper!" is now my automatic response to whenever anyone says anything is "all the same"

  66. Abi Foster says:

    I'm not gonna lie I really hate Starbucks over sweet drinks. Redeyes are superior!

  67. Spyro Fan says:

    This video kind of made me want to marry Brennan

  68. NEON GamerXZ says:

    Trapp die

  69. Dfine MIKE says:

    I actually prefer dark chocolate
    And bitter drinks lmao

  70. Peter Clive says:

    best coffee ever is pumpkin spice frappucino

  71. _ Datflotho - says:

    Brennan is too good and this part

  72. The nonoffensive demon unicorn says:

    Red does bang from beginging to end and Marvel is the fucking best. Fight me.

  73. QueercoreCentral EmmaTheCommunistSquirrel says:

    The MCU is full of contrivances and most of them suck.

  74. Roxx Ram says:

    Brennan is super extra and I love it.

  75. The Salacom says:

    I can tell that Brennan just wanted an excuse to play a knight character and all I can say is he fucking nailed it.

  76. Freddy Thornton says:

    the first two lines are the greatest writing i’ve ever witnessed

  77. Shelby Carpenter says:

    So I'm just now watching this and I knew how old it was when the knight said 18 Marvel movies

  78. Cheerio ate Noodles says:

    Do they like ever work at all?

  79. Trent Hutson says:

    Life becomes a lot more enjoyable once you realize you don't have to do things "differently" to enjoy them. It'd be like trying to write a story without doing anything that can be found on TVTropes.

  80. Monkeyking says:

    i like dark chocolate because of the fact it has less sugar

  81. Nana the Dwarf says:

    Singing Disney songs at karaoke is the shit, and yes, everyone knows the words.

  82. Dragon Smile says:

    I legit paused the video when he said “Christmas lights make small, depressing rooms feel warm and welcoming” to look up at my Christmas lights I just recently got for my small and depressing (even more so after my roommate moved out on me) dorm room. Yeah this video is legit, it may be basic but I have Christmas lights because IT WORKS, it really helped! Things do become “basic” because most people enjoy them, this message rings true

  83. Чича Јанко says:

    Oh no, the Normies are up to it again…

  84. BladeCyborgKid says:

    Brennan is the best of them in the office

  85. Dani de Janeiro says:

    I'd prefer to be basic than speak with the intense vocal fry of that bland lesbian. If you're so confident and sure of yourself, release your words and speak like the accomplished adult that you are.

  86. Marc Standley says:

    This is the best CH sketch ever. I come back to it time and again for a pick me up. Thank you Brennan!

  87. MACSえらんみげる says:

    "as are sunsets and rainbows, you viper!"
    I fkn lost it.

  88. Gary Jones says:

    This was awesome. Agreed with everything except, dark chocolate is better than milk.

  89. Gary Jones says:

    Also, you REALLY need the captions with dude. And what did Ally mean "A frappé? Really?"? They're the best around.

  90. Tamar Lambert says:

    "They're all the same" "AS ARE SUNSETS AND RAINBOWS YOU VIPER"

  91. DaGucka says:

    Damn, i just like what i like. I don't even know what other people like, except the ones that i hold dear.

  92. Denis21 says:

    So i'm basically a basic bitch and i don't mind it thanks to this brave knight!

  93. Sean McTiernan says:

    I wanted to see Defender of the Basic run into Defender of the Hipster. Yeah, someone needs to check him on the comment about the Red-eye.

  94. Dylan Minish says:

    0:27 alis voice kinda sounded like a mixture of a popular girl and a douche bag
    Sometimes your tastes can be a little basiiiiic

  95. Peanut Butter Productions says:

    Illuminati confirmed
    first candle shown has the symbol.

  96. Tesseract 14 says:

    I mean scented candles honestly suck I'd rather go for beeswax it smells so much better

  97. Tesseract 14 says:

    yeah but pizza I gross man I honestly don't get pumpkin spice as well its nasty, though I don't mind pumpkin cookies

  98. IndyMode says:

    Sometimes I come back to this video to put me in a good mood.

  99. Lahar Azis says:

    There's a legend saying Brennan's DM Voice is his real voice and he's struggling to keep his everyday voice.

  100. Tim Buktu says:

    Great. Now I want a pumpkin spice pizza.

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