Strangers Find Comfort and Safety on a Blind Date | {THE AND} Gresida & Leah

March 3, 2020 posted by


– How do you think your parents would react if you brought me home as your partner. (both laughing) – Oh my god. – Wow!
– That’s funny. – That. I was not expecting that. (cards flipping) (mouse clicking) (mouse clicking) (blindfold fabric slipping off) – In five words, describe what you think being intimate with me would be like. – Why did I feel like that was gonna be the
– (laughs) first question? I think it would be.. I think it would be sweet, caring, but also kinda fiery – Oh. (soft laugh) – A little.. A little spicy, but then also really comfortable. – I would say loud (laughs) and I don’t mean loud like the amplification of our voices. I mean, like, loud and big and, like, full. Bold and new. I think that was fine. Your turn. – What’s something you genuinely think I should know about you. – (big sigh) – Spill.
– Oh. Oh no. Okay I guess we’ll get a little bit, like, intense and deep. – Only if you want to. – Oh no. It’s fine, so if you were to search
my name on the internet, the first thing that would come up is some of the work that I’ve done, and it all is rooted back
to my source of trauma, which is the fact that
when I was a young teen, I was like 14 or 15 years old, someone posted nude pictures
of me on the internet without my consent, and those nude pictures
stayed up on the internet for about five, six years without my ability to get them taken down, and I ended up really using that as a
springboard for my own work as, you know, someone fighting in justice, and I ended up starting
an organization that combats revenge porn
or cyber sexual assault through holding protest marches in different cities nationwide and worldwide, so it’s something that is a deeply rooted part of who I am, because it happened to me so long ago, and it really established how I built myself as a person, and I’m still, you know, traumatized about a lot of things, because of what happened to me, but I think that that’s.. It’s just something important
that you need to know about me before anything, because it kinda explains
why I do what I do, why I say what I say, and how I what I feel. I think that’s why I
wanted to be here today, because I wanted to practice vulnerability in a way that was safe and comfortable and not use the Internet as a weapon, as it’s been used
against me so many times. – I love that.
– (soft laugh) – Well thank you for being here. – Oh! Of course! – I’m glad you’re here with me – Me too! – And we’re being vulnerable together
– What.. What.. I’ll ask the question to you again. What is the thing you think
I should know about you? – (soft laugh) I can be complicated sometimes. I have my moments. I… Well, okay. One thing definitely, I guess it’s pretty important, my family’s very interesting. They’re kinda crazy. They are not the most
supportive people in the world, but I still love them to death, even though they drive me absolutely nuts, like up a wall. I come from this culture that’s pretty homophobic, and kinda like racist, and they’re very more so saying like “You gotta be with a person who also comes from the same culture.”, and growing up here in New York and being really open and exposed to different types of people has made made me who I am and made me want to be open and, like, expose myself to
different types of people, so it’s.. I would say that’s an important thing that I was just like I don’t know if I want to spill it on the second question
– (laughs) – Or the eighth, but hey. – Well, it seems like your really willing to joke about it, but I can imagine that it still eats away at you to some degree. – Yeah. It does. – Yeah. – It’s kind of like my way of trying to like tell them, but then not necessarily
be serious about it, and then when I do want to
have serious conversations, they’re like “Are you joking around?” and I’m like No. I’m being serious – (laughs)
– I’m being serious, but I always like tend
to joke around with them, cause I just can’t have serious
conversations with them. It’s really hard for me to have a serious conversation with them. – Do you think it’s like a coping mechanism to some degree? – Probably. – Sorry. Not to psychoanalyze you.
– No! – But I think.
– No. I try and psychoanalyze myself too. I’m like why am I doing what I’m doing? It’s cause of my family, but yeah. – I’m sorry. – It’s okay. – Is it my turn? – I was gonna ask what your name is. – Please! Oh!
– I wanted to ask you in the beginning, and I totally forgot, and then you said “If
you look up my name”, I was like I don’t know what your name is.
– Oh yeah. My name is Leah. – Leah. Okay.
– What’s your name? – My name is Gresida. – Gresida.
– Yes. – That’s a very pretty name. – Yes. I’ve learned to love my name so – Yeah. Of course. You have to. cause nobody else will love it for you. – That’s true. – (chuckles)
– That’s true. – Okay. When was the last time you lied? – (clears throat) Wow um.. Sheesh. So I guess just maybe lying to myself and trying to convince myself that I’m okay and that whatever is going on, that I can deal with it, but I think that would be one of the.. Yeah, one of the biggest things recently. – Lying to yourself is like
the worst person to lie to, don’t you think?
– I know. Definitely the worst person to lie to, and I feel like I’ve done it so often to myself that it’s become so natural to do. The worst thing you can probably do is just convince yourself
that you’re feeling one way when you’re feeling a complete other way. – It’s impossible not to
lie to yourself sometimes I feel like, because we are just naturally fixers, and we want to make sure that things aren’t as bad as they may appear, but in doing so, we can’t come to terms with
things we might need to fix, so it’s challenging. Love that for us. – Yep. You know, just
good ol’ lying to yourself every now and then.
– Good ol’ lying to yourself.
– Every now and then. – No big deal. – Yep. Normal stuff. – Yep.
– We all do it. – Yep. (chuckles) – Okay. What (chuckles) What do you think are my soft spots, meaning if you had to seduce me, how would you? – Oh. Great. (both giggle) I am guessing that they mean physicality, but I’m not going to take it that way. I feel like one of your soft spots is clearly praise and affirmations, and so telling you that you’re doing well and that you’re comfortable and that you’re safe is probably something
that means a lot to you. Not that that would
necessarily seduce you, but it would make you feel better, and I feel like you
have to feel comfortable in order to be intimate with someone. Maybe, you know, hold your hand. Watch some poetry videos (laughs), so we are both feeling the vibe. (both laughing) I don’t know what that means, but just do intimate things like watch movies, relax, eat some good food until we’re both just really comfortable, and then I feel like other stuff comes along with that. – I like that you said comfortable, because when I think of like being intimate, my past experiences of being
intimate with other people, I’ve kinda like forced myself to be like Okay. You’re comfortable. This is cool, and I feel like we’ve probably
all been in that place every so often, and yeah. I do like those things. I think that’s really nice. You should see my bag, and I have a Button Poetry
sticker on my phone. – (gasps) I have Button
Poetry shirt. (laughs) – Oh! I like that! I don’t have a shirt. I have a tote bag, and I have a bunch of other
books at home too from there. – It’s my dream to be on Button Poetry. I love Button Poetry. (laughs)
– Oh my god. Okay. I freaking love
Button Poetry so much. We could watch a shit ton of Button Poetry.
– Yes! Exactly! Exactly. But that like is what it goes back to, like I feel like it’s
about lying to yourself, lying and saying that you’re comfortable when you’re really not.
– Yep! – And it’s about that honesty, so like obviously, if I was ever gonna seduce you or anyone it would have to be like
– Seduce me by bringing Button Poetry. Just here! – (laughs) Completely consensual, in that like we’re both completely aware that we’re both okay in that moment to do whatever happens, because otherwise it’s like one-sided. – Yep. – What would your ex warn me about being in a relationship with you. – (sighs) I guess.. – Or your last fling. – Yeah, the last fling. Maybe Maybe I’m a little overwhelming, in a sense that like if you kinda need your space, I will try and give you the space, but then I’m kinda like Are you okay? – (giggles) I like I worry. I’m like are you okay? How are you feeling? I can be a little bit overwhelming and maybe a little bit too much, and the reason why that happens
with me is kind of like, I like the person. I like them, and I’m just like I get excited, and I get like happy, and then it becomes a lot for them, and they’re like “Whoa.
You need to relax.”, so it kind of, I guess, maybe annoys them. I don’t know. I guess I can be annoying sometimes, and a little bit overwhelming. – I don’t think you
could ever be too much, like any person, I don’t think.. I think no one could ever be too much of who they are, and if someone tells you
that you’re being too much or implies that you’re being too much, then they’re not the right person for you, because the person who was right for you would never think that… – Yeah. – …what you give is
more than they could take, and if it is, then it’s not the right person. – Yeah. – But…
– It’s definitely something I’m learning about myself too. – Yeah.
– And trying to also tell myself like if they’re meant for you, then the way that you act and the way that you are being which is myself. This is me. Take me as I am. – Yeah! – It shouldn’t be a problem for anybody, and it’s hard to really like convince yourself of that, cause once again, we’re our biggest critics, and we’re always like “No, but you could’ve done this better, and you could’ve done this better, and you could’ve done a
little bit less of that and a little bit more of this.” – Right. – So it’s hard to like
get into that mind space, but definitely working on it, and as far as those last flings go, I’ve established that I’m like “That’s not me.
It was the other person.”, – Of course. – I was like I was being me. I was giving you love. – Exactly!
– You didn’t get… – I didn’t get none of that back, so you know what, screw you. – You didn’t want what I was serving, – Exactly.
– but someone will, – Somebody will.
– and that’s fine. – Exactly.
– Maybe they were a vegetarian and you were serving a
steak. I don’t know. (laughs) – I was. – Exactly. Exactly. What was the question? What would your ex warn you about me?
– Yes. – Should I answer the question? – Yes. If you want. – Okay. Yeah. – No worries. – I’ll answer all the questions. I think similar to the last question. My ex would probably warn you that I have mental health issues. I don’t think anyone should ever take a mental health issue as
something to warn someone about, but I think my ex would have done that. My ex told me when we
were breaking up that I was too broken to be fixed, and I think that they felt like it was their responsibility to fix me, and that responsibility that they felt was so burdensome to them that they couldn’t function in
the relationship anymore, so I acknowledge to be transparent that I have issues that I
am constantly working on, and I am not a fully
fleshed out person yet, but I’m trying so hard every day to do what I have to do. It’s like every day is a challenge for me, and I also want to prove them wrong. That I’m not too broken to be fixed. I’m not broken in any way. I am whole as I am despite the cracks in the surface. You know, what a terrible thing to
say to someone, you know? – I agree. That… I was like “Ouch. That hurts.” – Ouch. Yeah. That hurt. – No. That’s… I’m sorry
that she said that to you and made you feel that way, and even though we just met, I am proud of you – Thank you. – For advocating for yourself, and for knowing that you’re
doing great right now, and you’re doing the best that you can, and you’ll only get better from there. I’m proud of you for that. – Thank you.
– Even though I just met you, but I feel like people
need to hear it more often. Like I know I need to hear it, – Yeah!
– So I’m kind of like I’m gonna tell people I’m proud of them. If I feel like it’s something that they
need to be proud of, I’m gonna say it, because you should be proud of it. It’s super important. – Yeah. Well, I love
affirmations, as do you. – Yes. We do. – So I’m also proud of you for recognizing that no matter what you give, it’s not too much for someone. It’s their fault. Not yours, because that’s just completely true. I wouldn’t ever think anything otherwise. – Cool. (clears throat) Before leaving this space, What’s the last you want
to remember about me? (both laughing) – Definitely, I would remember
your smile physically, because
– That was such a terrible front.
– No. Me too. (both laughing) because it’s very memorable. It was the first thing
I noticed about you, and I hope it’s the last
thing that I remember, and then just how open you are, and how I think forgiving you are to yourself. I think that that’s something
I’d like to take with me and learn from you. That you seem like you’re completely aware of what you have to offer, and if someone doesn’t want to take that, then that’s completely okay with you, and I think that that’s really brave, so I think your bravery is something that I’d like to remember and your smile. – You’re giving such good answers. I’m like
– (laughs) – They’re so like
– Thanks. – Nice and wholesome answers, and I feel like I might be I don’t even know what my answers are sounding like.
– No! You’re great! – Thank you. I appreciate that. – I would say your bravery too. You’ve held marches before. You’ve experienced things that have made you the person that you are, and you’re fucking brave man. Like, that’s awesome just to experience what you’ve experienced and then go out there
and be so open about it, and start movements and
have marches about it, and it’s super important, so I would say you bravery too. – Thanks. – You’re welcome. – Hi guys. Thank you so much for watching. This is Mimi at Skin Deep. If you want be apart of our community If you want to join our movement, you can subscribe to our newsletter at theskindeep.com/subscribe Thank you so much.

64 Comments

64 Replies to “Strangers Find Comfort and Safety on a Blind Date | {THE AND} Gresida & Leah”

  1. bbaby lani says:

    bruv.

  2. Ricardo Carrillo says:

    2nd

  3. Sara J says:

    they’re both cute

  4. Brittnee Martinez says:

    Leah has been through it and came out stronger. 🙌🙌🙌

  5. Yente says:

    They both have such inviting facial expressions, makes me wanna be friends with them lmao

  6. TS Giraffe says:

    So so so powerful 🔥🔥🔥

  7. Lene Kolodziej says:

    They are both talking so gently and you can hear them already caring for each other!💜

  8. Ray Or Nothing says:

    They definitely have something here, I like it .

  9. Jessie Leigh says:

    I smiled all the way through this! 💓

  10. EmiBarry Hope says:

    They're both so cute ❤️😍

  11. Noriye Alice says:

    I wonder why leah started blinking so much??? Makeup in her eye perhaps

  12. obscurity87 says:

    i wanted to like this connection but there is something about the person with short hair sounding preachy and a little chatty.. a little disingenuous ..but i hope i'm wrong

  13. ARMY - Love yourself says:

    Am I the only one that noticed how many times the left girl blinked?

  14. Staygoldenkidd 23 says:

    blink, blink, blink blink blink

  15. akeridae says:

    They’re sweet 🙂

  16. TheDovM says:

    Great conversation! 🙂

  17. Becauseidontknow says:

    i wish i would known them and their signs

  18. Luisella Mordan Hidalgo says:

    Quality content

  19. Nick Mason says:

    Nick D'Agostino today is my B'day can u guys wish me

  20. Mert Can says:

    I dunno how relevant this feedback is here, but could you please align the names in the title with the people on the screen? Like 'Leah & Gresida' since Leah is on the left? Not that the names are THAT important, but it might be a good idea for people who missed the names at the beginning. Thanks!

  21. Aj Fletcher says:

    The girl with the glasses is beautiful

  22. J T says:

    and I don't mean loud like THE AMPLIFICATION OF OUR VOICES

    that's a lot

  23. newie says:

    Leah seems like such a wise and warm person! 💜

  24. jenerationl says:

    Leah, you are extremely perceptive, intuitive and brave. Much respect to you.

  25. Hassan Haido says:

    The chick in glasses is super cute….like nerdy cute 😩😍

  26. Bridget Woods says:

    This world needs more Leah's. They are a walking, talking lesson to us all. Physically, they present themselves different to the status quo. I wouldn't be surprised if they are judged based off of their haircut, or their clothing. Perhaps people are scared of the different. However, it only takes a minute of hearing Leah to know that she radiates a care, compassion, understanding, and reflection that we are all in such dire need of. I hope that we can all be inspired by them. The strength as well to go through what they've gone through, and then rise to where we see them now. Inspiring.

  27. jbaby007 says:

    I don't see these girls getting together but maybe continuing a lovely friendship. I always love the lesbian episodes 💜🌈💜

  28. Leah Juliett says:

    Thank you all for your kindness & positive responses to our conversation. This was an incredible experience and lesson in vulnerability for both of us. Thank you to the Skin Deep for the opportunity! If you're interested, you can follow us on Instagram. We'd love to continue the conversation!

    Gresida: @g_mun_
    Leah: @leahjuliett

  29. Jane Fisher says:

    Leah's voice sounds just like Lena Dunham's!

  30. I hate usernames ! says:

    This was so cute to watch

  31. Nicole Alaniz says:

    🥰ooooh looks like these two have a great connection already❤️

  32. Saereraeren says:

    This conversation was incredibly lovely. I think they both maybe needed to hear what the other one had to say––if they don't end up together in whatever capacity, it will be a meeting that will have helped them grow more into a better version of themselves. I am happy for them. (also omg they are both SO cute)

    Also, Gresida gives me Natalie Portman vibes––her looks, her smile, and her voice.

  33. Alex K says:

    Cuties in action and I love leah’s style 💞💞

  34. 宇宙愛 says:

    I wonder why; if there is a big girl (or a guy) in these "Skin Deep" episodes, they always – without fail – pair them with another person that reflects their body weight. It's subtly telling us, that a fat person cannot be without a person who is "in shape", and vice versa. This kind of thing is just really primitive and it enforces stereotypes that I don't think need any more enforcing by channels like these. As in: "awww, you guys will be so good together".

    And for the record: I thought both of these girls are adorable. I merely can't stand the double standards some woke people maintain in complete oblivion, while trying to tout the highest possible moral standards at the same time.

    Pair people at random. To truly be equal, you don't pick and pair people based on looks. You take human beings – no matter what they look like, and see what happens. It might be a cliché, but personality truly is the end all be all in this world.

  35. bel do ceu says:

    acknowledging someone's love language so naturally throughout dialogue. god. what could be more romantic than that?

  36. Sibusiso M says:

    this was so beautiful 😍

  37. bel do ceu says:

    they were instantly comfortable with one another, it's truly beautiful to see

  38. Megan Post says:

    Leah is my spirit animal

  39. Giulia M. says:

    They are both so gentle and beautiful!

  40. lia says:

    I need a friend like Leah, she's so great

  41. Katia Laloubi says:

    That was so pure 💕

  42. Kawa Salih says:

    There was something very therapeutic in the manner of tenderness & warmth they spoke with each other. What a beautiful interaction. And they're both so darn cute! Thank you TSD 💙

  43. Ioana Serban says:

    You can feel what a sincere and strong soul Leah has from this beautiful conversation. I find it amazing how they are both amazingly good listeners and the way the approach the questions is so unique . Not to mention, Gresida has an amazing energy. Maaan, I just wanna give em a hug

  44. yonce ; says:

    “I don’t think you could ever be too much, I don’t think anyone could be too much of who they are” wow that was beautiful

  45. Jordan says:

    Ughhh 😪😭 I'm not crying you're crying…every time they were giving advice or responding to ea other I felt like they were talking to me lol. This conversation was deeply touching and beautiful. 🥰

  46. אדל וייס says:

    What a deep seeing one onather 💜

  47. oopi1 says:

    Haven't even finished watching and I already love them both! They both seem very sweet.

  48. Danielle Sonnenberg says:

    What a beautiful exchange between two people. I love the vulnerability you both shared. It is inspiring to me. I appreciate when people acknowledge the issues they are working on. Good for you. Keep shining. Lots of light!

  49. okayemily says:

    This is one of my favorites! I want to be both of their friends!

  50. LadyRed L says:

    Leah is the kind of person I'd fall for. Not because I'm gay but because they have walked through the fire and came out the other side not burned but burnished to a sheen. I walked through my own fire and survived. I love those people so much they're so strong.

  51. T P says:

    I had to look up button poetry after the 5th time they said it. Highly recommended.

  52. Jujubee Jujubee says:

    ❤️❤️

  53. Jujubee Jujubee says:

    ❤️

  54. Kaylamariee2186 says:

    I went to school with Leah and honestly watching the growth and maturity flow out of her has been such an amazing process. I honestly can’t believe how awesome
    she is

  55. Jujubee Jujubee says:

    Gresida….Gresida, man…some people should not be parents, i'm sorry.

    And i didnt like my name, but she takes the prize fr.

  56. Jo T. v.Z. says:

    I so know what it's like not to feel like a full person. You're not in this alone, we're all still learning, just keep doing you and eventually you'll feel 'whole'.
    It took me years and years but I got there, so know that it's possible ♥️♥️

  57. tsuyayaka1 says:

    They look like they’d be a couple.

  58. Ella says:

    They seem so well suited

  59. Laura Wenninger says:

    Wow what a beautiful conversation of two strangers! I would like to see more of this kind😍

  60. Eva Clark says:

    What a beautiful interaction.

  61. Victoria Zilke says:

    I'm almost crying, because I can relate to the 'overwhelming' part. I have been always too much, too loud, too needy, too whatsoever.
    And what Leah said touched something very deep inside me♥️
    Almost four years single and one person somewhere saying something like that. Thank you Leah, I really needed that to hear

  62. AGD Squared says:

    One of my favourite conversations. Affirmations, people.

  63. Chris Johnson says:

    The woman on the right has family that support the Trump Administration.

  64. Brianna Rud says:

    Wow. This is beautiful. The way those two communicate with each other (their communication skills period) and the thoughtfulness in the conversation… it's all so admirable.

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